This semester has greatly contributed to my English skills, especially in the analysis of poetry and learning to write based on ideas instead of devices. Before this year, my experience in poetry has been greatly limited as in AP Comp we focused on novel and play excerpts. No matter what experience I was with poetry I always enjoyed it and the presentation projects that we have had this semester has allowed to research and understand how the special formats of poetry contribute to the meaning and complexity. Unfortunately, while I learned a great deal about certain types of poetry such as the ballad and free verse poems, I did not retain very much from some other presentations besides the general formatting. To make sure I am capable of understanding any poem I come across I need to further research myself other types of poems and know how their special nuances contribute to meaning. The presentation projects have also helped me with the way I write essays in general. Previously, when during timed essays and not having enough time to through think through what I need to say, I would automatically slip into the general three body paragraph structure. I now know that this type of writing limits the depth of my analysis as I could not easily relate the devices I spoke about in each paragraph. By organizing my thoughts into idea categories instead, I can now show how all literary devices contribute to the many ideas that an author is trying to convey. Something I still need to work on, however, is the conciseness of my papers. Although I am able to better organize my thoughts and find complexities through connections of ideas I am still finding it hard to put my thoughts into the right words. My group's thesis statements over the semester have been very long, almost paragraph length and although sometimes it is necessary to utilize that many words I should still be able to condense the points I wish to make and then elaborate on them later.
One thing I have enjoyed this semester is the connection between the poems we studied and different fairy tales and myths. When we analyze such poems it is easy to see where the author inspiration has come from and the common themes that run through certain eras. The hero's archetypal journey is another thing I have enjoyed learning about. It seems like a very specific concept with the different steps that all hero's go through but it is extremely applicable to many, many different situations.
Although I have gotten though the surface of many different components of the analysis and understanding of literature I still have a lot to work. I need to work on being more independent with analyzing, coming up with more ideas before consulting my group, I need to work on looking for the details and underlying themes that make up complexity, and especially the fluidity of my writing.
Tuesday, December 15, 2015
Sunday, December 13, 2015
Blog #14: Paired Poems Group Presentation
Initial Essay
Helen was supposedly the most beautiful woman in Greece, who's face was said "to launch a thousand ships". This phrase coming from how Prince Paris of Troy saw Helen's beauty and took her for his own starting the ten year long Trojan War. The poems "To Helen" by Edgar Allen Poe and "Helen" by Eliza Doolittle both speak about Helen's beauty but the difference between the usages of diction, rhyme, and syntax create two entirely different attitudes.
The most obvious difference between the two poems is the diction choices. In "To Helen" Poe uses many Grecian references, alliteration, and speech much like that of Shakespearean times. This choice in diction relates "To Helen" to odes and sonnets even though the structure is not necessarily the same. Poe's choice in words also create a longing tone when speaking of Helen, making her beauty an aspiration. In "Helen", however, Helen's beauty is still an aspiration, they still want to keep it in statue form but Doolittle's choice of harsh, blunt words create the negative atmosphere around Helen, giving us reason to dislike Helen.
The rhyme scheme of each poem also conveys the tones and attitudes of each author towards them. Poe's consistent rhyme scheme creates a flowing voice throughout his poem along with the diction and syntax again creating the positive atmosphere around Helen. Doolittle, however, uses a few slant rhymes with very little true rhymes at all which adds to the harshness of her words.
Another component that separates the two poems is the syntactical choices. Poe's poem completes phrases while Doolittle's broken structures make us feel as if she were too angry to speak fluidly, adding emotion into her poem and forming the tone.
The flowing versus blunt diction, consistent in contrast to non consistent rhyme scheme, and fluid versus broken syntax both convey the beauty of Helen wth very different attitudes and tones.
Powerpoint
Tone Shifts
Annotations/ Close Reading/ Notes
Helen was supposedly the most beautiful woman in Greece, who's face was said "to launch a thousand ships". This phrase coming from how Prince Paris of Troy saw Helen's beauty and took her for his own starting the ten year long Trojan War. The poems "To Helen" by Edgar Allen Poe and "Helen" by Eliza Doolittle both speak about Helen's beauty but the difference between the usages of diction, rhyme, and syntax create two entirely different attitudes.
The most obvious difference between the two poems is the diction choices. In "To Helen" Poe uses many Grecian references, alliteration, and speech much like that of Shakespearean times. This choice in diction relates "To Helen" to odes and sonnets even though the structure is not necessarily the same. Poe's choice in words also create a longing tone when speaking of Helen, making her beauty an aspiration. In "Helen", however, Helen's beauty is still an aspiration, they still want to keep it in statue form but Doolittle's choice of harsh, blunt words create the negative atmosphere around Helen, giving us reason to dislike Helen.
The rhyme scheme of each poem also conveys the tones and attitudes of each author towards them. Poe's consistent rhyme scheme creates a flowing voice throughout his poem along with the diction and syntax again creating the positive atmosphere around Helen. Doolittle, however, uses a few slant rhymes with very little true rhymes at all which adds to the harshness of her words.
Another component that separates the two poems is the syntactical choices. Poe's poem completes phrases while Doolittle's broken structures make us feel as if she were too angry to speak fluidly, adding emotion into her poem and forming the tone.
The flowing versus blunt diction, consistent in contrast to non consistent rhyme scheme, and fluid versus broken syntax both convey the beauty of Helen wth very different attitudes and tones.
Powerpoint
Tone Shifts
Annotations/ Close Reading/ Notes
Blog #13: Paired Poems Revision (Chimney Sweeper)
The chimney sweepers of the late 18th century held a dangerous job, to be pushed down inside chimneys with brushes and bags so as to clean their interiors. Unfortunately, many of the chimney sweeps were children as they were the only ones who could squeeze into such tight places, and not knowing of the health dangers of continuous exposure to ash and smoke trusted their parents and did as they were told. Both of William Blake's poems that comment on this job utilize very similar rhyme scheme, diction, and syntax but the subtle differences between the two contribute the two different viewpoints of the poems. The first poem showing innocence and naivety, the second more mature and experienced.
In the first of Blake's poems, an "aabb" rhyme scheme is used in each stanza, while in the second poem "aabb" is used in the first stanza, but the second and third uses an "abab" pattern. The rhyming of the words adds an element of youth, which is what Blake is trying to do as he is speaking through the mouths of children in each poem. In the first poem however, the child is more innocent, doing his duty because they trust the adults and the "Angel" that tell them everything is going to be great and that the child and his comrades will be free and happy. In the second poem the child has seemed to have grown up more, he now knows that being a chimney sweeper is not something to be grateful for, but he assumes his parents do not notice the hardship "[doing him] no injury" (poem 2, line 10). He still trusts his parents but has experience to not be as naive as before. The rhyme scheme matches this difference between the children's perspectives as in the first poem the pattern makes the speech of the child seem shorter with more simple phrases, as if he does not generally compose complex thoughts, and each thought is sectioned into its own rhyming couplet. The rhyme pattern of the second poem, however, makes it seems like each stanza is a complete thought as the beginning lines are connected to the last. This difference in the rhyme patterns of each poem contribute to the image of the speaker in each instance and help convey the different messages of innocence and experience,
The diction and syntax in each poem also separate the messages in each poem. The first poem contains many blunt and direct words, outright telling us what has happened, there are not very many emotional adjectives for tone so the tone can be viewed as more objective or neutral. The second poem, though also containing rather simple words, uses more serious tone words such as "death", "woe", "injury", and "misery". Instead of the indifference of innocence we can see the speaker feels very negatively about the job that he must do. The difference in diction also conveys to us the difference between the naivety of the first child in comparison to the experience of the second.
Blake's usage of rhyme scheme, diction, and syntax help him to convey the naivety in the first poem with the child who is less mature, and the learning and experience of the child in the second poem. This shows the complexity of the time period where the job of chimney sweeps were common.
In the first of Blake's poems, an "aabb" rhyme scheme is used in each stanza, while in the second poem "aabb" is used in the first stanza, but the second and third uses an "abab" pattern. The rhyming of the words adds an element of youth, which is what Blake is trying to do as he is speaking through the mouths of children in each poem. In the first poem however, the child is more innocent, doing his duty because they trust the adults and the "Angel" that tell them everything is going to be great and that the child and his comrades will be free and happy. In the second poem the child has seemed to have grown up more, he now knows that being a chimney sweeper is not something to be grateful for, but he assumes his parents do not notice the hardship "[doing him] no injury" (poem 2, line 10). He still trusts his parents but has experience to not be as naive as before. The rhyme scheme matches this difference between the children's perspectives as in the first poem the pattern makes the speech of the child seem shorter with more simple phrases, as if he does not generally compose complex thoughts, and each thought is sectioned into its own rhyming couplet. The rhyme pattern of the second poem, however, makes it seems like each stanza is a complete thought as the beginning lines are connected to the last. This difference in the rhyme patterns of each poem contribute to the image of the speaker in each instance and help convey the different messages of innocence and experience,
The diction and syntax in each poem also separate the messages in each poem. The first poem contains many blunt and direct words, outright telling us what has happened, there are not very many emotional adjectives for tone so the tone can be viewed as more objective or neutral. The second poem, though also containing rather simple words, uses more serious tone words such as "death", "woe", "injury", and "misery". Instead of the indifference of innocence we can see the speaker feels very negatively about the job that he must do. The difference in diction also conveys to us the difference between the naivety of the first child in comparison to the experience of the second.
Blake's usage of rhyme scheme, diction, and syntax help him to convey the naivety in the first poem with the child who is less mature, and the learning and experience of the child in the second poem. This shows the complexity of the time period where the job of chimney sweeps were common.
Blog #12: Paired Poems Benchmark Essay & Reflection (Chimney Sweeper)
The chimney sweepers of the late 18th century held a dangerous job, to be pushed down inside chimneys with brushes and bags so as to clean their interiors. Unfortunately, many of the chimney sweeps were children as they were the only ones who could squeeze into such tight places, and not knowing of the health dangers of continuous exposure to ash and smoke trusted their parents and did as they were told. Both of William Blake's poems that comment on this job utilize very similar rhyme scheme, diction, and syntax but the subtle differences between the two contribute the two different viewpoints of the poems. The first poem showing innocence and naivety, the second more mature and experienced.
In the first of Blake's poems, an "aabb" rhyme scheme is used in each stanza, while in the second poem "aabb" is used in the first stanza, but the second and third uses an "abab" pattern. The rhyming of the words adds an element of youth, which is what Blake is trying to do as he is speaking through the mouths of children in each poem. In the first poem however, the child is more innocent, doing his duty because they trust the adults and the Angel that tell them everything is going to be great and that the child and his comrades will be free and happy. In the second poem the child has seemed to have grown up more, he now knows that being a chimney sweeper is not something to be grateful for, but he assumes his parents do not notice the hardship "[doing him] no injury" (poem 2, line 10). He still trusts his parents but has experience to not be as naive as before. The rhyme scheme matches this difference between the children's perspectives as in the first poem the pattern makes the speech of the child seem shorter with more simple phrases, as if he does not generally compose complex thoughts, and each thought is sectioned into its own rhyming couplet. The rhyme pattern of the second poem, however, makes it seems like each stanza is a complete thought as the beginning lines are connected to the last. This difference in the rhyme patterns of each poem contribute to the image of the speaker in each instance and help convey the different messages of innocence and experience,
The diction and syntax in each poem also separate the messages in each poem. The first poem contains many blunt and direct words, outright telling us what has happened, there are not very many emotional adjectives for tone so the tone can be viewed as more objective or neutral. The second poem, though also containing rather simple words, uses more serious words such as "death", "woe", "injury", and "misery". Instead of the indifference of innocence we can see the speaker feels very negatively about the job that he must do. The difference in diction also conveys to us the difference between the naivety of the first child in comparison to the experience of the second.
Reflection:
I would grade myself a 5 or possibly a 4. My analysis of the two poems is good but could have been more specific. I can work on having a deeper analysis citing more literary devices in comparison to my more shallow analysis. I can also work on smoother transitions in y writing, in this instance referring to each poem was hard considering that the had the same title and were written by the same person. Consequently i referred to each poem by order which did not complicate things too much by my writing could have been smoother. I need to work on my wording skills in order to better convey what I want to say.
In the first of Blake's poems, an "aabb" rhyme scheme is used in each stanza, while in the second poem "aabb" is used in the first stanza, but the second and third uses an "abab" pattern. The rhyming of the words adds an element of youth, which is what Blake is trying to do as he is speaking through the mouths of children in each poem. In the first poem however, the child is more innocent, doing his duty because they trust the adults and the Angel that tell them everything is going to be great and that the child and his comrades will be free and happy. In the second poem the child has seemed to have grown up more, he now knows that being a chimney sweeper is not something to be grateful for, but he assumes his parents do not notice the hardship "[doing him] no injury" (poem 2, line 10). He still trusts his parents but has experience to not be as naive as before. The rhyme scheme matches this difference between the children's perspectives as in the first poem the pattern makes the speech of the child seem shorter with more simple phrases, as if he does not generally compose complex thoughts, and each thought is sectioned into its own rhyming couplet. The rhyme pattern of the second poem, however, makes it seems like each stanza is a complete thought as the beginning lines are connected to the last. This difference in the rhyme patterns of each poem contribute to the image of the speaker in each instance and help convey the different messages of innocence and experience,
The diction and syntax in each poem also separate the messages in each poem. The first poem contains many blunt and direct words, outright telling us what has happened, there are not very many emotional adjectives for tone so the tone can be viewed as more objective or neutral. The second poem, though also containing rather simple words, uses more serious words such as "death", "woe", "injury", and "misery". Instead of the indifference of innocence we can see the speaker feels very negatively about the job that he must do. The difference in diction also conveys to us the difference between the naivety of the first child in comparison to the experience of the second.
Reflection:
I would grade myself a 5 or possibly a 4. My analysis of the two poems is good but could have been more specific. I can work on having a deeper analysis citing more literary devices in comparison to my more shallow analysis. I can also work on smoother transitions in y writing, in this instance referring to each poem was hard considering that the had the same title and were written by the same person. Consequently i referred to each poem by order which did not complicate things too much by my writing could have been smoother. I need to work on my wording skills in order to better convey what I want to say.
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
Blog #4: Open Question Essay
In Life Of Pi by (author) a different form of creulty than usual is found. As Piscine Molitar Patel tries to survive in the open waters of the Atlantic, he must also share his small life boat with a Royal Bengali Tiger named Richard Parker. Piscine(Pi) acts creuly towards Richard Parker at times so that he can exert his social dominance, a status needed in order for him to live.
When Pi Patel is shoved into the sea he looks to see what supplies. To his surprise there is a package of orange whistles that may as well have been the reason he survives. An adult royal Bengali Tiger, such as Richard Parker, would not be fightable. One bite or scratch would rip a teenage boy to shreds. Pi realizes this but he also knows he needs to be in control. So he conditions Richard Parker to be submissive. With his whistles, he blows a high pitched screech to show Richard Parker that he is in charge. Pi only gives Richard Parker food at certain points so that Richard knows he must rely on Pi. The creulty Pi shows for Richard is not because of an unconscious psychodynamic drive, but a calculated social dominance. Richard Parker, on the other hand, receives this creulty as motivation to not harm Pi; for Pi is the only thing keeping him alive.
Pi, however, is not the only one to use creuly to condition others. When Pi is 8 years old, Pi's father brings him to a tiger cage with the intent on teaching a lesson. The Royal Bengali, though not Richard Parker, is beautiful and daunting. A goat is released into the cage. Poor, 8 year old Pi Patel is forced to watch as a goat is mauled to death by a Tiger who had gone hungry for 5 days. Pi's father did not do this to torture his son, instead it was to motivate his son to not mess around with the tigers and consequently not be mauled to death like the goat.
Creulty, in this book, is a function to motivate. Pi's father motivates him and Pi motivates Richard. Throughout the book there are many more examples of this creulty conditioning, especially as Pi and his father train animals in their zoo.
Acts of creulty are not always sprung from the hands of cold-hearted people, but instead as (author) shows us, can be used to exert a social dominance or provide as a motivational tool to do what we need.
Reflection:
I would grade my essay as a 5 essay. Although I do have a few good points of analysis, I use a lot of paraphrase because I felt the need to explain exactly where my points were coming from. After reading the benchmark essays I realize that I don't need to explain the plot of the novel as much as I did. As a result, much of my essay is paraphrased. Instead I should limit my details and try to analyze more specifically rather than vaguely connect the book to cruelty. Some of my analysis is also quite superficial and I should have gone deeper into exploring Pi as a both a victim and a perpetrator, which Richard Parker could be seen as as well. My essay also contains quite a few grammar/surface errors, such as spelling cruelly wrong every single time, but I believe if I focus more and am more organized, these errors will be reduced very easily.
Peer Reflection:
http://phillipsmelissaapenglish2015.blogspot.com/2015/09/blog-4-open-response-essay.html#comment-form
I would also score your essay in the 5-6 range. Your essay demonstrates a great knowledge of the text you are analyzing, especially because of the quote and the specific details. I agree that there was some paraphrasing but it was not to prevalent. As for the actual analysis, I believe you could have developed upon why the Euells and others were motivated to discriminate against black people and how that motivation drove their cruelty as well as connect it to other aspects such as social or political dominance. You also could have talked more about what the acts of cruelty reveal about the victim as you have a very good part on the perpetrator. Overall it is a very well written essay, it just needs a little more development and connection back to the them of the entire book.
3x3:
Pi finds Identity-the"oridnary world" where Pi finds his talents
Storm breaks Boat- the beginning of the "special world" where Pi faces hardships unlike any other and learns the skills and principles it takes to survive
Richard saves Pi- the end of the special world when Pi is returned to the ordinary world with a new sense of life and new experience that help him cope with the changes since he has been gone
Revisions:
In Life Of Pi by Yann Martel a different form of cruelty than usual is found. First off Pi's father, a zookeeper must use a certain calculated cruelty to train his animals as well as his sons so none get hurt. Also, Piscine Molitar Patel tries to survive in the open waters of the Atlantic, he must also share his small life boat with a Royal Bengali Tiger named Richard Parker. Piscine(Pi) acts cruelly towards Richard Parker at times so that he can exert his social dominance, a status needed in order for him to live.
When Pi is 8 years old, Pi's father brings him to a tiger cage with the intent on teaching a lesson. The Royal Bengali, though not Richard Parker, is beautiful and daunting. A goat is released into the cage. Poor, 8 year old Pi Patel is forced to watch as a goat is mauled to death by a Tiger who had gone hungry for 5 days. Pi's father did not do this to torture his son, instead it was to motivate his son to not mess around with the tigers and consequently not be mauled to death like the goat. It is during this time with his father, in is normal home, where Pi is a victim of violence. Pi is still learning about how to work with such dangerous animals, a skill that will allow him to survive the shipwreck and turn him into the perpetrator.
When Pi Patel is shoved into the sea he looks to see what supplies. To his surprise there is a package of orange whistles that may as well have been the reason he survives. An adult royal Bengali Tiger, such as Richard Parker, would not be fightable. One bite or scratch would rip a teenage boy to shreds. Pi realizes this but he also knows he needs to be in control. He meets his road of trials and he must condition Richard Parker to be submissive. With his whistles, he blows a high pitched screech to show Richard Parker that he is in charge. Pi only gives Richard Parker food at certain points so that Richard knows he must rely on Pi. The cruelty Pi shows for Richard is not because of an unconscious psycho dynamic drive, but a calculated social dominance. Richard Parker, on the other hand, receives this cruelty as motivation to not harm Pi; for Pi is the only thing keeping him alive. This shows Richard Parker and Pi as both the perpetrators and victims, a balance attained through Pi's hard work and refusal to die at sea even though his family had. The journey of these two and the balance they attained on their small boat helps them save each other; Pi is able to do what he needs to provide and Richard keeps Pi company and reason to not curl up and die himself.
Cruelty, in this book, is a function to motivate. Pi's father motivates him and Pi motivates Richard. Throughout the book there are many more examples of this cruelty conditioning, especially as Pi and his father train animals in their zoo. Pi learns these skills throughout his life as he conquers his life in India, his time on the lifeboat, and his new life afterwards.
Acts of cruelty are not always sprung from the hands of cold-hearted people, but instead as (author) shows us, can be used to exert a social dominance or provide as a motivational tool to do what we need.
Reflection:
I believe that the hero's journey has helped me with being able to write this prompt but not necessarily to revise it. After comparing the hero;s journey to Pan's Labyrinth and Life of Pi, it is easy to see how most stories follow this pattern in some way or another. There are many elements from the hero's journey that I could have used in my essay to better show how Pi is a perpetrator and a victim, however, my previous essay did not set up these elements very well and is was hard to revise the essay so I could add in these elements. It would have been easier to incorporate both from the beginning which is a skill I will, of course, be working on. By knowing that stories follow this pattern it will help me organize and analyze.
When Pi Patel is shoved into the sea he looks to see what supplies. To his surprise there is a package of orange whistles that may as well have been the reason he survives. An adult royal Bengali Tiger, such as Richard Parker, would not be fightable. One bite or scratch would rip a teenage boy to shreds. Pi realizes this but he also knows he needs to be in control. So he conditions Richard Parker to be submissive. With his whistles, he blows a high pitched screech to show Richard Parker that he is in charge. Pi only gives Richard Parker food at certain points so that Richard knows he must rely on Pi. The creulty Pi shows for Richard is not because of an unconscious psychodynamic drive, but a calculated social dominance. Richard Parker, on the other hand, receives this creulty as motivation to not harm Pi; for Pi is the only thing keeping him alive.
Pi, however, is not the only one to use creuly to condition others. When Pi is 8 years old, Pi's father brings him to a tiger cage with the intent on teaching a lesson. The Royal Bengali, though not Richard Parker, is beautiful and daunting. A goat is released into the cage. Poor, 8 year old Pi Patel is forced to watch as a goat is mauled to death by a Tiger who had gone hungry for 5 days. Pi's father did not do this to torture his son, instead it was to motivate his son to not mess around with the tigers and consequently not be mauled to death like the goat.
Creulty, in this book, is a function to motivate. Pi's father motivates him and Pi motivates Richard. Throughout the book there are many more examples of this creulty conditioning, especially as Pi and his father train animals in their zoo.
Acts of creulty are not always sprung from the hands of cold-hearted people, but instead as (author) shows us, can be used to exert a social dominance or provide as a motivational tool to do what we need.
Reflection:
I would grade my essay as a 5 essay. Although I do have a few good points of analysis, I use a lot of paraphrase because I felt the need to explain exactly where my points were coming from. After reading the benchmark essays I realize that I don't need to explain the plot of the novel as much as I did. As a result, much of my essay is paraphrased. Instead I should limit my details and try to analyze more specifically rather than vaguely connect the book to cruelty. Some of my analysis is also quite superficial and I should have gone deeper into exploring Pi as a both a victim and a perpetrator, which Richard Parker could be seen as as well. My essay also contains quite a few grammar/surface errors, such as spelling cruelly wrong every single time, but I believe if I focus more and am more organized, these errors will be reduced very easily.
Peer Reflection:
http://phillipsmelissaapenglish2015.blogspot.com/2015/09/blog-4-open-response-essay.html#comment-form
I would also score your essay in the 5-6 range. Your essay demonstrates a great knowledge of the text you are analyzing, especially because of the quote and the specific details. I agree that there was some paraphrasing but it was not to prevalent. As for the actual analysis, I believe you could have developed upon why the Euells and others were motivated to discriminate against black people and how that motivation drove their cruelty as well as connect it to other aspects such as social or political dominance. You also could have talked more about what the acts of cruelty reveal about the victim as you have a very good part on the perpetrator. Overall it is a very well written essay, it just needs a little more development and connection back to the them of the entire book.
3x3:
Pi finds Identity-the"oridnary world" where Pi finds his talents
Storm breaks Boat- the beginning of the "special world" where Pi faces hardships unlike any other and learns the skills and principles it takes to survive
Richard saves Pi- the end of the special world when Pi is returned to the ordinary world with a new sense of life and new experience that help him cope with the changes since he has been gone
Revisions:
In Life Of Pi by Yann Martel a different form of cruelty than usual is found. First off Pi's father, a zookeeper must use a certain calculated cruelty to train his animals as well as his sons so none get hurt. Also, Piscine Molitar Patel tries to survive in the open waters of the Atlantic, he must also share his small life boat with a Royal Bengali Tiger named Richard Parker. Piscine(Pi) acts cruelly towards Richard Parker at times so that he can exert his social dominance, a status needed in order for him to live.
When Pi is 8 years old, Pi's father brings him to a tiger cage with the intent on teaching a lesson. The Royal Bengali, though not Richard Parker, is beautiful and daunting. A goat is released into the cage. Poor, 8 year old Pi Patel is forced to watch as a goat is mauled to death by a Tiger who had gone hungry for 5 days. Pi's father did not do this to torture his son, instead it was to motivate his son to not mess around with the tigers and consequently not be mauled to death like the goat. It is during this time with his father, in is normal home, where Pi is a victim of violence. Pi is still learning about how to work with such dangerous animals, a skill that will allow him to survive the shipwreck and turn him into the perpetrator.
When Pi Patel is shoved into the sea he looks to see what supplies. To his surprise there is a package of orange whistles that may as well have been the reason he survives. An adult royal Bengali Tiger, such as Richard Parker, would not be fightable. One bite or scratch would rip a teenage boy to shreds. Pi realizes this but he also knows he needs to be in control. He meets his road of trials and he must condition Richard Parker to be submissive. With his whistles, he blows a high pitched screech to show Richard Parker that he is in charge. Pi only gives Richard Parker food at certain points so that Richard knows he must rely on Pi. The cruelty Pi shows for Richard is not because of an unconscious psycho dynamic drive, but a calculated social dominance. Richard Parker, on the other hand, receives this cruelty as motivation to not harm Pi; for Pi is the only thing keeping him alive. This shows Richard Parker and Pi as both the perpetrators and victims, a balance attained through Pi's hard work and refusal to die at sea even though his family had. The journey of these two and the balance they attained on their small boat helps them save each other; Pi is able to do what he needs to provide and Richard keeps Pi company and reason to not curl up and die himself.
Cruelty, in this book, is a function to motivate. Pi's father motivates him and Pi motivates Richard. Throughout the book there are many more examples of this cruelty conditioning, especially as Pi and his father train animals in their zoo. Pi learns these skills throughout his life as he conquers his life in India, his time on the lifeboat, and his new life afterwards.
Acts of cruelty are not always sprung from the hands of cold-hearted people, but instead as (author) shows us, can be used to exert a social dominance or provide as a motivational tool to do what we need.
Reflection:
I believe that the hero's journey has helped me with being able to write this prompt but not necessarily to revise it. After comparing the hero;s journey to Pan's Labyrinth and Life of Pi, it is easy to see how most stories follow this pattern in some way or another. There are many elements from the hero's journey that I could have used in my essay to better show how Pi is a perpetrator and a victim, however, my previous essay did not set up these elements very well and is was hard to revise the essay so I could add in these elements. It would have been easier to incorporate both from the beginning which is a skill I will, of course, be working on. By knowing that stories follow this pattern it will help me organize and analyze.
Friday, August 28, 2015
Blog #3: The Prose Passage
Many sad stories have been written over the years, mostly gloomy, morose, and heartbreaking, as well as containing children and dogs. In The Beet Queen, however, by Louise Erdrich, a different way of depicting this sadness is apparent. Erdrich uses devices such as selection of detail, point of view, imagery, and tone to tell her story.
Erdrich uses selection of detail at many points to stress how the environment impacts the children. First, Erdrich talks about the children in the boxcar, "their lips violet and their feet were so numb that, when the jumped out of the boxcar, they stumbled and scraped their palms and knees through the cinders." The inclusion of the facts that they were so cold their lips were violet and that they stumbled and became injured getting out of the boxcar paints the children not as vagabonds illegally riding a train, but as helpless, doing all they can to survive. Another example of selection of detail is the experience of Karl and the tree. Edrich describes the tree as quite ordinary but when Karl sees it, "his cheeks went pink" and he was so drawn to the blossoms this "scratch of light" that he buried his face in the blossoms. By describing to us in such detail Karl's reaction we are able to see how Karl has been reduced to hopelessness. So much so that this scraggly tree draws him so deeply into its arms.
Another device Erdrich uses is point of view. Erdrich tells this story in a third person viewpoint.
From this view we can know some of both Mary and Karl's feelings but others are hidden. We also see the situation taking place from the outside. Having so many different views helps us understand the characters. From the outside we see the direct response. We see Karl slowly walking towards the tree and burying his face, but we also see Mary turning around with an expression of surprise because her brother has become so entranced in the flowers. Such an unexpected occurrence. The multiple ways a third person narrator can tell the story depicts the characters in different lights an allows us to see how Karl is affected by the tree. How unusual it is and why it is important.
Reflection:
I think my writing on this particular prompt was not sufficient so I would score it a 4. I begin the essay alright but my analysis gets more and more vague and I use less and less textual evidence to back up my claims.I have a few organizational errors, and I am very repetitive, especially in the last paragraph. I also ran out of time, making my analysis incomplete. This causes my argument to be unconvincing. Overall, my essay did not show a adequate analysis of the passage, which is why I scored in the lower range. A measurable goal I could have for myself is to read and organize for at least 7 minutes before I begin writing. This should help me with my organization greatly.
Peer Reflection:
http://deatonginaapenglishlit2016.blogspot.com/2015/08/blog-3-prose-essay-assessment.html#comment-form
You have a very well written essay with a very concise analysis. You are very specific in of your paragraphs as you analyze each element used by the author in her story. Your essay provides some very good insights, going deeper than the surface and you even provide some ideas, that though not explicitly or particularly implicitly stated, connect well to the prompt and your analysis. The comparison between Karl and Mary is also apparent in your essay and an important part of examining the effects of the environment. In your reflection you state that you focus on the symbol of the tree and that is not necessarily a bad thing to focus on, as it is such a big part, but make sure to connect it to other parts of the story as well. I would agree with your scoring and grade your essay as a 5, with a little more development and expansion to encompass more parts of the story I believe you could score a very high range number.
Erdrich uses selection of detail at many points to stress how the environment impacts the children. First, Erdrich talks about the children in the boxcar, "their lips violet and their feet were so numb that, when the jumped out of the boxcar, they stumbled and scraped their palms and knees through the cinders." The inclusion of the facts that they were so cold their lips were violet and that they stumbled and became injured getting out of the boxcar paints the children not as vagabonds illegally riding a train, but as helpless, doing all they can to survive. Another example of selection of detail is the experience of Karl and the tree. Edrich describes the tree as quite ordinary but when Karl sees it, "his cheeks went pink" and he was so drawn to the blossoms this "scratch of light" that he buried his face in the blossoms. By describing to us in such detail Karl's reaction we are able to see how Karl has been reduced to hopelessness. So much so that this scraggly tree draws him so deeply into its arms.
Another device Erdrich uses is point of view. Erdrich tells this story in a third person viewpoint.
From this view we can know some of both Mary and Karl's feelings but others are hidden. We also see the situation taking place from the outside. Having so many different views helps us understand the characters. From the outside we see the direct response. We see Karl slowly walking towards the tree and burying his face, but we also see Mary turning around with an expression of surprise because her brother has become so entranced in the flowers. Such an unexpected occurrence. The multiple ways a third person narrator can tell the story depicts the characters in different lights an allows us to see how Karl is affected by the tree. How unusual it is and why it is important.
Reflection:
I think my writing on this particular prompt was not sufficient so I would score it a 4. I begin the essay alright but my analysis gets more and more vague and I use less and less textual evidence to back up my claims.I have a few organizational errors, and I am very repetitive, especially in the last paragraph. I also ran out of time, making my analysis incomplete. This causes my argument to be unconvincing. Overall, my essay did not show a adequate analysis of the passage, which is why I scored in the lower range. A measurable goal I could have for myself is to read and organize for at least 7 minutes before I begin writing. This should help me with my organization greatly.
Peer Reflection:
http://deatonginaapenglishlit2016.blogspot.com/2015/08/blog-3-prose-essay-assessment.html#comment-form
You have a very well written essay with a very concise analysis. You are very specific in of your paragraphs as you analyze each element used by the author in her story. Your essay provides some very good insights, going deeper than the surface and you even provide some ideas, that though not explicitly or particularly implicitly stated, connect well to the prompt and your analysis. The comparison between Karl and Mary is also apparent in your essay and an important part of examining the effects of the environment. In your reflection you state that you focus on the symbol of the tree and that is not necessarily a bad thing to focus on, as it is such a big part, but make sure to connect it to other parts of the story as well. I would agree with your scoring and grade your essay as a 5, with a little more development and expansion to encompass more parts of the story I believe you could score a very high range number.
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
Blog #2: Poetry Assessment
Long have humans been hurt by the arrows of love. Lost love is an injury that cannot be readily seen or heard by outsiders, but is felt throughout the entire mind and body and that feeling will often extend in whatever new love prospects happen to come by: feelings of gloominess, passiveness, caution, and mistrust. A poem written by George Gascoigne in the sixteenth century expresses just this feeling. Gascoigne's attitude towards love can be seen in the words he chooses, the examples he uses, and the form of the poem.
Poetry is often a showcase of many feelings, examples, and scenarios all put together in a short, concise way, so diction choices are very important so as to accurately portray the perspective the author wants you to see. The morose disposition of the author can be seen especially through the adjectives and adverbs used throughout the poem; words such as louring(gloomy), trustless, aloof, deep deceit, and grievous. These words are very poignant synonyms of sadness and show how the author has experienced so much hurt that he now trusts nothing and sees deceit in things that are most likely innocent. The diction used by the author in this poem very precisely placed to express the author's attitude towards love.
The imagery used by Gascoigne also expresses his attitude on love. In his first example of a rat previously trapped after being lured in by bait, who has now escaped, we see a pour mouse with hurt feelings rather than an annoyed human who had set out to catch pests. The example of the scorched fly who, being attracted to light, was burned by a fire shows us a fly who no longer finds bright things quite so joyful as it used to. The imagery of these examples, however, does not come from countless sentence and infinite descriptions of the scenario taking place. Our visualization is so vivid because the situations that Gascoigne chooses to tell are ones of great familiarity to most everyone. Although I have never seen a mouse trap in action of a fly being swallowed by flames, it is very easy for me to picture these exact scenes in my mind, but instead of a neutral situation where mice and insects are pests, they are spun to be the protagonists with whom we sympathize with. The examples Gascoigne uses, though not copious in description, create an image that everyone can see and feel.
In his poem, Gascoigne uses a a certain form to his prose. Although there is no easily discernible rhythm to his words the alternate rhyming of the last words in each line creates unity within the text, pulling all the words together in a way that only poetry can manage.
Reflection:
I would grade my essay at a 6 level.This is because I was able to express my ideas clearly and make references to the text, but my analysis of how form affects the authors attitude was incomplete/not thorough enough. In order to improve upon my score I must learn more about forms of poems, which I'm sure we will get to do in class, since we have not had any previous information given to us. I could also work on being more concise in my wording; as I was writing the essay I realized that it was hard for me to come up with the words I wanted. By educating myself more on writing diction I will increase the level of my prose and cut down on time spent on this problem, allowing me enough time to finish the essays. I could do this by reading other well written essays, like we did, or just do more higher level reading in general.
Peer Comments:
http://choprariddhiapenglish2015.blogspot.com/2015/08/benchmark-poetry-essay.html#comment-form
Poetry is often a showcase of many feelings, examples, and scenarios all put together in a short, concise way, so diction choices are very important so as to accurately portray the perspective the author wants you to see. The morose disposition of the author can be seen especially through the adjectives and adverbs used throughout the poem; words such as louring(gloomy), trustless, aloof, deep deceit, and grievous. These words are very poignant synonyms of sadness and show how the author has experienced so much hurt that he now trusts nothing and sees deceit in things that are most likely innocent. The diction used by the author in this poem very precisely placed to express the author's attitude towards love.
The imagery used by Gascoigne also expresses his attitude on love. In his first example of a rat previously trapped after being lured in by bait, who has now escaped, we see a pour mouse with hurt feelings rather than an annoyed human who had set out to catch pests. The example of the scorched fly who, being attracted to light, was burned by a fire shows us a fly who no longer finds bright things quite so joyful as it used to. The imagery of these examples, however, does not come from countless sentence and infinite descriptions of the scenario taking place. Our visualization is so vivid because the situations that Gascoigne chooses to tell are ones of great familiarity to most everyone. Although I have never seen a mouse trap in action of a fly being swallowed by flames, it is very easy for me to picture these exact scenes in my mind, but instead of a neutral situation where mice and insects are pests, they are spun to be the protagonists with whom we sympathize with. The examples Gascoigne uses, though not copious in description, create an image that everyone can see and feel.
In his poem, Gascoigne uses a a certain form to his prose. Although there is no easily discernible rhythm to his words the alternate rhyming of the last words in each line creates unity within the text, pulling all the words together in a way that only poetry can manage.
Reflection:
I would grade my essay at a 6 level.This is because I was able to express my ideas clearly and make references to the text, but my analysis of how form affects the authors attitude was incomplete/not thorough enough. In order to improve upon my score I must learn more about forms of poems, which I'm sure we will get to do in class, since we have not had any previous information given to us. I could also work on being more concise in my wording; as I was writing the essay I realized that it was hard for me to come up with the words I wanted. By educating myself more on writing diction I will increase the level of my prose and cut down on time spent on this problem, allowing me enough time to finish the essays. I could do this by reading other well written essays, like we did, or just do more higher level reading in general.
Peer Comments:
http://choprariddhiapenglish2015.blogspot.com/2015/08/benchmark-poetry-essay.html#comment-form
Your essay presents an amazing knowledge and identification
of the form, diction, and imagery used by Gascoigne's poem "For That He
Looked Not upon Her" but the analysis of devices does not always connect
back to the attitude that you believe the author has. In the introduction
paragraph you state that the "author seems pessimistic" and is
"in a miserable state of grieving" which tells us your opinion but
you do not elaborate further on these feelings. Instead, you use the devices
that you find to say that they help "the flow of his ideas"
(paragraph 1) or "his message" (paragraph 2). Your writing is very
concise and well written but it is missing the key element of connecting back
to the development of the author’s attitude as the prompt asks, which in turn
weakens your argument. I would grade your essay as a very high 6; you
"express your ideas clearly" but are "less thorough in the
discussion of the attitude and devices” (rubric, 7-6). I think it’s very likely
that you will score in the 8 range if you respond to the prompt completely.
http://lennonkaraapenglish2015.blogspot.com/2015/08/blog-2-poetry-assessment.html#comment-form
The identification of the imagery and diction is good, especially the acknowledgement of the fire adjectives which then connect the imagery and diction used by Gascoigne. Your essay does contain some analysis of the metaphors after a small paraphrase, but does not go very deep, so it seems slightly superficial. Your essay also does not talk about the form used by Gascoigne, and speaks only slightly on the diction. Another important part of the prompt was relating the devices back to the authors attitude, which you did do, but in an indirect way. Some times it is hard to tell that you are speaking about the authors attitude rather than a person's general feelings on the poem. An example of this would be in the last paragraph when you are saying the diction choices "evoke warm feelings of awe and excitement and lust that are attached to the subject", this part needs clarification on why these specific emotions come from the warm words and how they shape the authors attitude. Overall I would grade this essay as a 5. This essay could have been a 6 but needs some more organization and development.
Revision:
In For He Looked Not Upon Her, George Gascoigne presents his complex attitude on love due to the loss of a woman in his life. Gascoigne's use of form, contrasting diction, and simple imagery relay to us his feelings of sadness but still love of this bright, shining woman, who now causes him pain.
Gascoigne's poem is, in fact, a Shakespearean sonnet with three quatrains, a rhyming couplet, all with ten syllables, and with the rhyming pattern abab cdcd efef gg. The three quatrains and rhyming couplet split the poem into four parts all with a different focus. The first quatrain introduces the subject, Gascoigne's sadness due to lost love, and the inability to look at her because she is too bright. The second quatrain brings in the metaphor of the mouse and speaks about how the author is now trustless. The third quatrain is the metaphor of the fly, and how you learn not to let yourself fall into dangerous, yet beautiful, things. The final two lines tie back to the beginning, yet with a different tone, to say that he will no longer be "dazzled by desire" and again, not look upon her face. The seperation of the poem into these parts allows us to follow Gascoigne's logic as he tries to decide what to do with his now emptier life. Just as he shifts his focus, Gascoigne also shifts his tone in each of these four parts, going from somber to despair, hopelessness, and finally more reflective and neutral. These tones all build and construct the authors complex attitude on love.
Gascoigne's choice in diction is also very revealing about his attitude. When speaking about himself, the mouse, and the fly, Gascoigne uses morose words such as louring(gloomy), trustless, aloof, deep deceit, and grievous. These all showcase a somber tone around himself. These words are very poignant synonyms of sadness and show how the author has experienced so much hurt that he now trusts nothing and sees deceit in things that are most likely innocent. When describing the woman, however, very different words are used; such as gleam, fancy, dazzled, desire, and blazing. The diction used by the author in this poem very precisely placed to express the author's attitude towards love itself as tragic but for the woman as still in love.
The imagery used by Gascoigne also expresses his attitude on love. In his first example of a rat previously trapped after being lured in by bait, who has now escaped, we see a pour mouse with hurt feelings rather than an annoyed human who had set out to catch pests. The example of the scorched fly who, being attracted to light, was burned by a fire shows us a fly who no longer finds bright things quite so joyful as it used to. The imagery of these examples, however, does not come from countless sentence and infinite descriptions of the scenario taking place, they are instead, very simple. Our visualization is so vivid because the situations that Gascoigne chooses to tell are ones of great familiarity to most everyone. Although I have never seen a mouse trap in action of a fly being swallowed by flames, it is very easy for me to picture these exact scenes in my mind, but instead of a neutral situation where mice and insects are pests, they are spun to be the protagonists with whom we sympathize with. The examples Gascoigne uses, though not copious in description, create an image that everyone can see and feel.
Gascoigne develops his complex attitude of sadness towards love and enchantment by a woman through his choice in form, contrasting diction, and simple imagery.
http://lennonkaraapenglish2015.blogspot.com/2015/08/blog-2-poetry-assessment.html#comment-form
The identification of the imagery and diction is good, especially the acknowledgement of the fire adjectives which then connect the imagery and diction used by Gascoigne. Your essay does contain some analysis of the metaphors after a small paraphrase, but does not go very deep, so it seems slightly superficial. Your essay also does not talk about the form used by Gascoigne, and speaks only slightly on the diction. Another important part of the prompt was relating the devices back to the authors attitude, which you did do, but in an indirect way. Some times it is hard to tell that you are speaking about the authors attitude rather than a person's general feelings on the poem. An example of this would be in the last paragraph when you are saying the diction choices "evoke warm feelings of awe and excitement and lust that are attached to the subject", this part needs clarification on why these specific emotions come from the warm words and how they shape the authors attitude. Overall I would grade this essay as a 5. This essay could have been a 6 but needs some more organization and development.
Revision:
In For He Looked Not Upon Her, George Gascoigne presents his complex attitude on love due to the loss of a woman in his life. Gascoigne's use of form, contrasting diction, and simple imagery relay to us his feelings of sadness but still love of this bright, shining woman, who now causes him pain.
Gascoigne's poem is, in fact, a Shakespearean sonnet with three quatrains, a rhyming couplet, all with ten syllables, and with the rhyming pattern abab cdcd efef gg. The three quatrains and rhyming couplet split the poem into four parts all with a different focus. The first quatrain introduces the subject, Gascoigne's sadness due to lost love, and the inability to look at her because she is too bright. The second quatrain brings in the metaphor of the mouse and speaks about how the author is now trustless. The third quatrain is the metaphor of the fly, and how you learn not to let yourself fall into dangerous, yet beautiful, things. The final two lines tie back to the beginning, yet with a different tone, to say that he will no longer be "dazzled by desire" and again, not look upon her face. The seperation of the poem into these parts allows us to follow Gascoigne's logic as he tries to decide what to do with his now emptier life. Just as he shifts his focus, Gascoigne also shifts his tone in each of these four parts, going from somber to despair, hopelessness, and finally more reflective and neutral. These tones all build and construct the authors complex attitude on love.
Gascoigne's choice in diction is also very revealing about his attitude. When speaking about himself, the mouse, and the fly, Gascoigne uses morose words such as louring(gloomy), trustless, aloof, deep deceit, and grievous. These all showcase a somber tone around himself. These words are very poignant synonyms of sadness and show how the author has experienced so much hurt that he now trusts nothing and sees deceit in things that are most likely innocent. When describing the woman, however, very different words are used; such as gleam, fancy, dazzled, desire, and blazing. The diction used by the author in this poem very precisely placed to express the author's attitude towards love itself as tragic but for the woman as still in love.
The imagery used by Gascoigne also expresses his attitude on love. In his first example of a rat previously trapped after being lured in by bait, who has now escaped, we see a pour mouse with hurt feelings rather than an annoyed human who had set out to catch pests. The example of the scorched fly who, being attracted to light, was burned by a fire shows us a fly who no longer finds bright things quite so joyful as it used to. The imagery of these examples, however, does not come from countless sentence and infinite descriptions of the scenario taking place, they are instead, very simple. Our visualization is so vivid because the situations that Gascoigne chooses to tell are ones of great familiarity to most everyone. Although I have never seen a mouse trap in action of a fly being swallowed by flames, it is very easy for me to picture these exact scenes in my mind, but instead of a neutral situation where mice and insects are pests, they are spun to be the protagonists with whom we sympathize with. The examples Gascoigne uses, though not copious in description, create an image that everyone can see and feel.
Gascoigne develops his complex attitude of sadness towards love and enchantment by a woman through his choice in form, contrasting diction, and simple imagery.
Reflection:
I feel that my essay has greatly improved after this revision. In general, I may have done some paraphrasing but I believe at least some of it was necessary so as to further my analysis. A problem I still had was trying to find the best words to present my ideas. This, however, has been a normal problem, and though it does not affect me much right now, it will in a timed setting. I need to work on being more concise in my words and have a wider vocabulary. A reason that I admire poetry is that the author and get across his meaning so effectively in a relatively small amount of words, it is my hope that as we study and write poetry my skills at this will get better.
Blog #1: Multiple Choice Reflection
The first AP Lit multiple choice assessment of the year, if only a pretest to see where we stand at this early point, did not go over as well as I would have hoped. Although this is a new year with a new curriculum, and the methods and knowledge we had learned (and presumably retained) in AP Comp do not exactly apply, I scored a low 11/25, or 44%. For me, one of the skills I should know how to apply and yet still do not yet fully do, is the close reading of the text at hand. I understand the importance and helpfulness of close reading, yet when presented with so many questions, and so little time, my conscience seems to escape me and I merely underline interesting lines or words. Another problem caused by the time crunch is that I tend to believe there is less time than there actually is, so I stumble through the text not reading it completely and missing key components, which further lead into my bad scoring. Time management is something I need to work on so I can calmly analyze the text without rushing my mind. Another source of my demise is that we have not yet learned the information needed to answer some of the questions pertaining to devises used. This information, however, will surely come and decrease the amount of points lost in that department. Similarly, another source of my troubling score is the different types of questions we have not been presented with before. In AP Lit we are asked more "philosophical" (a mon avi) questions than in AP Comp, drawing parallels between the literary world and ours, and analyzing extremely extended metaphors. Overall I would deem my score not so concerning at the moment but I certainly have plenty of room and directions to grow. I am looking forward to wonderfully informative year.
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